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Winterthur, DE
Change City

Shifting the Conversation About Scams: No More Victim Blaming March 2025

Posted on 03/26/25

FRAUD / Stop hand sign concept (Click for more)

Words matter.

This is especially true when talking about fraud and scams. In our technology-connected world, fraud and scams have become commonplace. It seems everyone has been a target of a scam. Yet, when discussing these crimes, our language often falls short. We tend to blame victims rather than recognizing the sophistication of modern scams and the emotional toll they take. Let’s change the narrative.

When a thief breaks into a home or someone is robbed on the street, we don’t point fingers at the victims. Instead, we use terms like “criminal” and “felony” to describe the perpetrator. When it comes to fraud victims, the tone shifts. We say they “should have known better” or that they were “tricked” or “duped.” These words subtly place blame on the victim, perpetuating a harmful narrative.

Fraud victims not only suffer financial losses, but also grapple with shame. Unlike victims of other crimes, they often blame themselves. Questions like “How did you fall for it?” or “How much money did you give the scammer?” magnify their devastation. This shame compounds their trauma, leaving them isolated and hesitant to share their experiences. Just as we empathize with victims of physical crimes, we must extend the same compassion to fraud victims.

Instead of saying someone “fell for a scam,” we can describe the scammer’s actions as “perpetrating fraud”, “stealing money”, or “criminal.” This shift removes blame from the victim and highlights the criminal’s responsibility. Here are some common phrases we can change:

DON’T USE
SAY THIS INSTEAD
Scammers tricked you.
Scammers are professional criminals.

 
She was duped into handing over her money.
A criminal stole her life savings.
How could you fall for that? Didn’t you see the flags?
This isn’t your fault – you experienced a crime. 

 
How much money did you give them?
How much did the criminal steal? 

 
You should have known it was too good to be true.
Fraudsters use elaborate lies to convince us of their legitimacy. 
Fraud only happens to older people.
Fraud affects people of all ages and backgrounds.
Get over it. There’s nothing you can do.
You are a crime victim; let’s report it to law enforcement and contact the AARP Fraud Watch Network Helpline for next steps at 877-908-3360.

Today’s scams are incredibly sophisticated. Scammers exploit psychological vulnerabilities, manipulate emotions, and create convincing scenarios. They are professional criminals. Recognizing this complexity helps us avoid victim-blaming.

We need to focus on holding scammers accountable at a personal level, in the media, and as a society. Reporting incidents, educating others, and advocating for stronger regulations are essential steps. When we do, we can keep billions of dollars in our economy, empower victims to report these crimes, and motivate the criminal justice system and policymakers to meaningfully combat fraud.

To create change, we all need to shift our thinking and choose our words carefully. Victim blaming can come from strangers, friends, family. It can come from any of us. It might be overt, or it might be subconscious and unintentional. In either capacity, victim blaming adds to the emotional burden of the victim. When we hold criminals accountable, we create safe spaces where victims can share their stories without fear of judgment. By listening and offering support, we can reduce the shame associated with being a victim of a scam.

We can also share information and resources to support fraud victims. AARP’s Fraud Watch Network (www.aarp.org/fraudwatchnetwork) website offers many resources for victims of scams:

  • A helpline 877-908-3360 for victims of scams and to report local scams
  • Online support sessions for victims
  • Watchdog Alerts that deliver information on the latest scams to your email or phone
  • Scam tracking map to find the scams happening in your area
  • The Perfect Scam podcast where victims share their stories and experts offer advice
  • AARP Veterans Fraud Center
  • Words Matter When Talking About Fraud website

Your words matter…all our actions do. Help us change how our society thinks and talks about victims of scams.
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